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abloomnrosebud's Journal  damn life sucks right now enough said Current mood:  exhausted.
wow..have i been on a rollercoaster or what...lol and i mean that literaly and emotionally! my birthday was awesome!! thanks to EVERYONE who went! i enjoyed EVERYONES company! i hope you all had fun!! thanks for everything!! it was a blast!! very tiring but good!! I lost my voice, it is slowly coming back though...haha i sound like a man! hahahahaha...dude, last night i was hella crying! i want to grow up, but i dont want to have to do all the work to get there. aka laziness! i hella need to snap down and get my shit done. no more excuses. I COULD be working harder. i NEED to do this. NOT just for my parents but for me! i need a college education! even though i just want the degree and not have to go through all the shit to get it, i still need to do it! ahhh...i gotta study for a math test! see ya so...i'm hella stressed...i am not doing as well in school as i thought...i just want to pass my classes this semester...ALL of them! we shall see. Market Broiler is getting better i don't dread going to work anymore...i deal with it...lol...i went back to cattlemens on tuesday and ate with Z after she got off...that was nice seeing everyone again. guess what?? SATURDAY IS MY BIRTHDAY!!! we are going to have soo much fun!! i can't wait!!! what are you going to get me Current mood:  ecstatic.Current music: my hump...i think that song is dumb.... so, i have been not so good lately. I dunno, i've been starting to feel like i was feeling back in jr. year. THE WORST year of my life. I feel so down and depressed. Not good enough, lonely, stressed, tired, like a bad person. I dunno, i try to snap myself out of it, but its not working. I keep looking back at who I was senior year, I loved that person. I was so outgoing and comfortable with myself. Now, i feel like a bitch who is lonely and lazy. I dunno what started it. UGH! i just don't know. I have been crying for random reasons. I ended things with nick. I did it! i dunno, i did it through a text message...haha...that was a little harsh but he had it coming. school is really hard, i am having trouble keeping up with my classes. work is demanding. i work all the time!! if i am not at school i am working and if i happen to be home, all i wanna do is lay down and watch tv or sleep and NOT do school work. so i have to do it at school, but i am too tired to concentrate there. UGH...i dunno i am just WHATEVER. maybe with my birthday coming up things will get cheerier. i dunno...i'm sad :( and i don't like being sad...i liked it when i was always laughing and smiling and talking to people and making other people laugh. I guess I liked the attention? and not that my friends have moved and are busy and all i am doing is constantly going, i am not getting attention? lol..i dunno...all i know is something needs to change. I am excited about two things, 1. my cousin (the one that i have had issues with for a LONG time) and I are going to start going to the gym MWF in the morning, i am REALLY excited about that! 2. my BIRTHDAY!! Neha and I invited a BUNCH of people to come with us to Great America. we want ALL of our family and friends to be there!! I am soo excited!! it is going to be soo much fun!! alot better then staying home with my friends and renting a bunch of movies. well...send me smiles and laughter and maybe things will be looking up from here on out...thanks...love you all!!! bye* Current mood:  depressed.Current music: Defying Gravity-Wicked BEST musical EVER. so...time for a new update. my job...sucks! it's HELLA boring, then it gets slammed busy, which i am used to, but it is different at Market Broiler. the people, are ASSHOLES! i really do NOT like them. the only person i really like is one of the supervisors Eddie, the other supervisor, Ben, isn't bad either. but seriously! that ALL suck! they are rude, incompetent (sp, lol), BITCHY, and inconciderate. i swear i dunno how the restaurant is able to thrive on the way they opperate their business. i find it to be CRAZY! i HELLA miss the PEOPLE at cattlemens. I am very comfortable with not working there anymore. I just miss the people like Travis, and Best Friends, Chris, Joe, Ralph, JOANNA!, Janelle, and of course ZAINAB!! i just miss EVERYONE. It makes me sad :( I have been working and going to school NON stop! I have two jobs, three soon, I am going to start interpreting ASL at my church. AND i am taking 17 units worth of classes. I just had my Psych mid term. I think I got a B maybe a high B. which i am comfortable with. I was totally stressin over english. Since I have been sick I have missed class and when i woke up today i checked the syllabus and thought we had a FAT paper due! i was FLIPPING out! but luckily it isn't due for a while!! the teacher post poned it! YAY! I need help in math, my teacher is an IDIOT! i swear. I'm hungry. lol OMG! big brother!! I REALLY want janelle to win!!! IF someone from the "friendship" has to win it. i would want Maggie. I AM SOOOOO glad April is out of there!! i HATED her! i mean HATED! i don't like ivette too much either, but whatev. Omg so i dont work tonight or tomorrow night!! thats HELLA crazy! ugh...my tummy is rumbling...i think nick is ignoring me, he hasn't talked to me since my break last night, which is a LONG time for us...lol..whatev seriously i am kinda thinking things need to be over with him. lately he has been telling me how much he cares and stuff but for some reason i dont buy it. could i be falling out of love?? lol...whatever...ugh i want someone new...well basically i want to move on...but how many times have i said that before? lol...we'll see alright... i know you all miss me. i miss you too! love you much bitches Current mood:  hungry.Current music: Sorry, Sorry-Rooney. 1. Go here. 2. Pass it on. ( my answers ) WOW...this process sucks ASS! ok...soooo back on July 25 I went around and filled out a bunch of applicants. went to a few hotels, picked apps at Texas Roadhouse and Olive Garden. When I went to Tony Romas they interviewed me on the spot. The guy seemed happy with me. He evern GARAUNTEED me a second interview!! AWESOME! So then a week went buy and i hadn't heard anything from Tony's so i called and they were like "we will call you" umm...ok..so then finally the next tuesday (8/2)i went back to Texas Roadhouse and Olive Garden to turn in my application. Texas Roadhouse told me to stop by thursday before 3:30 (i get off work at 3) for n interview. and Olive Garden told me that they would call me, cause my availability doesn't really meet up to their requirements. I also stopped by Market Broiler to fill out an app. so then thursday rolls around (8/4) and i rush over to Texas Roadhouse for my interview. the guy wanted me to come back the following monday, but i was leaving for my week long camping trip. so he told me to just call him back when i came back from vaca. so i came back and still NO ONE had called me back from all the places i had applied. so i called everyone back. and Tony's is like "call back on friday"!! UGH! and then Olive Garden said no, cause I need to be able to work 2 lunchs M-Th. and i can't do that, so whatev. and When i called Market Broiler WOW...the lady was like "can I give you some advice? You should come in to the restaurant to check in, it's more professional" WOW BITCH! they said they weren't hiring. damn! so i call Texas Roadhouse and they ask me to come in Thursday (8/18). so i come in,and they are like "well, we are having a function today, so our manager is unable to speak with you, come back tuesday" umm..ok. so then i come back tuesday which was this past tuesday and they are like oo well the manager you already talked to is managing today so come back tomorrow (as in yesterday) so i am like..wow...ok...oo and i called tony romas back, the place that GUARANTEED me a second interview...and they were like we aren't hiring right now, when in the interview he told me TWO hostesses were leaving! BASTARD. so then yesterday my mom wakes me up and is like ALYSSA starbucks is having a job fair today in hayward you need to go to it that hour break you have between psych and eng. i'm like...umm ok (in my head i'm thinking there is NO WAY i can drive all the way to hayward, interview , and then drive ALL the way back in ONE hour...hell no...so i take my time getting ready and just decided to skip psych and just go to the job fair. so i go fill out an app and this lady interviews me. so was nice. said she would call me back later this week so her manager could talk to me! thats a good sign! so then i go to school and after math (which ends at 3) i HAUL ASS all the way down to Texas Roadhouse and the guy is like, well our manager is really busy right now so come back tomorrow!! WTF!!! OMG OMG OMG! i want to KILL them! this is RIDICULOUS!!! INSANE!! so when i got home the starbucks lady called and we set up an interview for monday at 12:30...we shall see how it goes. OO and then in Bio on of the hotels called me back. so i have to call them. i dunno..i have to go to Roadhouse AGAIN today. but this time I am CALLING before I go to make sure it is still ok..cause this is ridiculous! BASTARDS...i hate having to find another job! DAMN CATTLEMENS why you have to be so SHITTY! Current mood: hungry.
ok...so i am currently in the library and my 2 and a half hour break is coming to a close. I am starving and wont have an opportunity to get food till around 10 tonight. i have only had a cup of coffee today. lol....psych is stupid. my teacher is an idiot, he doesn't know how to conduct a lecture. stupid ass. how do u mess up on a lecture?!?!?! but he seems to be able to succeed just fine. then i had an hour break till english and i wanted to start on the psych chapter, but i left that book at home, so i started math. then my english teacher is cool. while we were taking a quiz he was reading the intros to the assignment we had turned in. and i think i heard him say "This is funny Alyssa" but i wasn't really paying attention, but i think that is what he said. if so, AWESOME! I think i did ALRIGHT on the quiz, whatev. it was just a quiz. then i actually learned stuff in math! lol. after math i went to the library and have spent the last 2 hours here watching my history lectures. which aren't really lectures they are HELLA boring! and I still have three to go through and watch 2 videos. i am going to have to come in tomorrow after my "interview" with Texas roadhouse. I went there last thursday cause they told me to come in and have my second interview then, and when i got there the lady was like, ooo well we are having a function today and our manager is unavailable to speak with you, so come back tuesday. ugh! whatever. so after that i will have to come back up here and watch the rest of history, so i can type my reaction paper and turn it in. My history course is self-paced, so there is no actually meetings with the professor. we email him our assignments (10 reaction papers) and then when we are ready for the tests we do it through e-mail. so i think as long as I do everything I should be fine. he gave us a guidline as to when things should be turned in but you can turn them in whenever you want. i would like to stick as close to the guideline as possible, but the first paper is due tomorrow. lol...thats not going to happen. so we will see. i have class in 15 min. i'm hungry. ugh! i hate mondays!!! they can kiss it! Current mood: hungry.
so, i was DREADING having to go back to school. I'm taking 17 units! with a job and i NEED to find ANOTHER job. so i will have school plus two jobs! AHH. i was totally stressin cause classes are going to be crazy and NO one has called me back about my applications! So sunday i had gotten back from a week of camping (which was awesome, even had a little suprise text message) and i started school the next day! so yesterday i started classes. they all went rather well! My psych teacher is totally going to keep me engaged into the course! which is AWESOME since helms made me detest the subject. after psych i have an hour break. then my english class seems pretty chill too! my math teacher is REALLY crazy! haha...but should provide some awesome laughter. I even know a few people in the class, doesn't mean i talk to them...lol...but i know them. after math i have a TWO AND A HALF HOUR break! but its cool cause i have a self pased history course that i can do during that time. plus i have english lab and bio CD's that i have to do. After the break i have Bio Lecture only on M W. I dunno I have Sam, some of her friends from swimming, Jackie from work (well, ex-work) and her friend Erica. So i know some people. which is kinda cool cause i can get help in that class. i am TOTALLY going to need it! Over all i am excited cause my schedule seems jammed packed so there is no room for mistakes, but knowing me i will find a way to screw up...lol...yea so today i am at my day job and when i get home got some homework and then i gotta call ALL the places I applied to and find out whats goin on. then i need to call DELL cause my laptop is SHIT. and then after Z gets off work she will comeover to watch big bro. OO and i before she comes over i need to find time to watch saturdays episode of big bro. OO and i need to call my dad and make an appointment with the bank for thursday so we can go and get my loan switched over to my name completely. how exciting! lol...then the weekend with NOTHING to do since i dont have cattlemens. :( what am i going to do! lol...i will find something...alright. love you all...well actually, i don't think anyone reads my lj..lol...its basically just for me i guess. which is kinda lame. i duno..maybe i wont update anymore and just read peoples lj's. i dunno...dont really think anyone cares...haha...whatev! Peace no one! Current mood: optimistic.
tomorrow is my last night at cattlemens. I am going to miss it. I truly am. I have been applying to other places, but no one has called me back. and the one place that "gauranteed" me a second interview hasn't called me back and its been almost two weeks. and now that i will be on vacation for a week, if someone calls to make an interview and i am not here they might give the job to someone else....ugh stressin! and the bookstore isn't open till next week, but i am gone so i wont have my books in time for class!! AGH!!! i just want to apologize to EVERYONE...cause i have been a REALLY BIG BITCH lately. I am sorry! i know there i no excuse but i am really stressin and i am on my period....lol...so sorry guys!! LOVE YOU ALL!!! Current mood: drained.
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